Sunday, November 1, 2009

CodeWeavers Announces Lame Duck Support Insurance Policy

On Anniversary of Huge Software Giveaway, CodeWeavers Announces "It’s NOT Free" Special for Wednesday, October 28
In 2008 CodeWeavers Gave Away 650,000 Free Licenses in 24 Hours; This Year’s Special Includes "Lame Duck Insurance Policy" Offering 2-for-1 Support

SAINT PAUL, Minn. (October 27, 2009) – On the one-year anniversary of the software industry’s largest-ever one day giveaway—a publicity stunt that nearly crippled his company—Jeremy White, the deeply embittered CEO of CodeWeavers, announced ALL of his software will NOT be free tomorrow in celebration. "Not even CLOSE to free," White proclaimed in announcing his non-giveaway. "Still, we’ll have some pretty good deals."

Last Year: A Mushroom Cloud of New Users
The time was July, 2008. The plan: as part of CodeWeavers' "Great American Lame Duck Challenge," if President Bush could accomplish one of five goals by his term’s end – including reducing the price of gas to below $3 / gallon – CodeWeavers would give away its CrossOver software to anyone who wanted it. CrossOver is a highly-celebrated open source software that enables individuals to run Windows applications without purchasing a Windows license from Microsoft. And then, in mid-October 2008, as the global financial meltdown unfolded and the Great Recession kicked into fifth gear, gas hit $2.79 in the Twin Cities, and CodeWeavers announced that the giveaway was on.

The result was an internet phenomenon. On October 28, 2008, nearly 650,000 people downloaded CrossOver. "Our servers melted, my sales director was sobbing uncontrollably and we basically burned to the waterline," White said. "We were suddenly the hottest commodity on the Web after porn." One year later, though, White says he’s seen the light. "My socialist phase has passed; I’m back to being a greedy capitalist. It’s time for somebody to bail me out!"

This Year: CodeWeavers Actually Asks People to BUY Their Software
Wednesday, October 28, 2009, in a shocking, one-time-only shift away from its previous marketing stance, CodeWeavers has decided to try making money instead. For a 24-hour period commencing at midnight, October 28, CodeWeavers will offer ALL of its software for NOT free. "Half off, to be precise," intoned White. "But that’s still pretty darned good. No, we probably won't be moving as many licenses, but our servers won't be puddles of slag in the morning, either."

Users buying during the NOT free promotional period will automatically later receive CodeWeavers forthcoming "Zombie Mallard" and "Snow Mallard" releases, named in honor of the twisted Lame Duck that spawned them.

"Zombie Mallard" will allow CodeWeavers users CrossOver Games product to play Valve's fervently anticipated forthcoming Left 4 Dead 2 release, available in mid-November. "Snow Mallard," CodeWeavers next-generation productivity app, will allow users to install Windows applications directly from CodeWeavers huge online database of known software installation recipes.

"We think the Mallard releases will offer significant improvements to the way our current (non-paying) customers enjoy using CrossOver," White chuckled, then gagged from his stress-induced acid reflux. "A pity the Mallards won't QUITE be ready until after the Lame Ducker's 1-year support period has expired. That's just pure coincidence, though."

CodeWeavers Offering Assuring Insurance With Sale
White is also offering customers two further perks during this year’s "giveaway." First, they will receive the Lame Duck Insurance Policy.

"Starting Oct. 28th, for every day the customer waits for Snow Mallard to be released, we'll tack TwoWO days onto their support entitlements," White said from his desk, as he bent over and picked up a penny. "How’s that for a public option?

"It’s a pretty sweet deal: The later we ship, the more value the customer receives for their money. Not only that, but we're giving away 25 free lifetime licenses of CrossOver as well. That oughta pump up some interest; at least, that's what Marketing better hope," White muttered, in reference to his disgraced Marketing department, now chained to their desks until the company sells 650,000 PAID licenses. "Marketing got us into this mess in the first place; they ain't getting out of it until I say they’re out," White sneered. "Back to work, you!"

About CodeWeavers

Founded in 1996 as a general software consultancy, CodeWeavers today focuses on the development of Wine, the core technology found in all of its CrossOver products. The company's goal is to bring expanded market opportunities for Windows software developers by making it easier, faster and more painless to port Windows software to Mac OS X and Linux. CodeWeavers is recognized as a leader in open-source Windows porting technology, and maintains development offices in Minnesota, the UK and elsewhere around the world. The company is privately held. For more information about CodeWeavers, log on to www.codeweavers.com.

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